This year as we waited for the ball to drop in a little beach town in West Michigan, Ben leaned over and asked me if I had any resolution s for 2017. In my typical fashion I stated that I hate things like that, but we named a few things....read more, be more joyful...things of that nature. But guys really, I HATE these things. Its another way to fail. And I hate failing.
It's another way to dissapoint....yourself or another person, and I hate disappointment.
Especially when it involves disappointing someone else.
How ironic that the resolution that we have come up with this year would be "to be intentional" I just have this really big feeling that we might be disappointing some people.
I have a feeling that in the "saying no, so we can say yes to only things that build relationships or build up God's kingdom" could be mighty disappointing.
But oh my word, am I excited about this.
For so long as an individual, I have run around trying to get away with not disappointing, never saying no, giving very ounce of energy without ever filling back up because saying no...to netflix, or game night, or even just cleaning the bathroom when it isnt even dirty because I have nothing else to do, and I can't just stop doing things, I must be moving at all times or I am truly failing at being an adult is....
JUST. TOO. DISAPPOINTING.
And I have suffered.
And those around me have suffered...because while I could have been giving my all to build relationships, I was half heartedly engaging in small talk because its all my very tired, raw heart could handle.
Having deep conversations with my mentor were few and far between because I just couldn't handle any more emotionally tiring things..or physically tiring if we are being honest.
So here's to a year of saying "YES" wholeheartedly to relationships and deep talks, and for goodness sakes...some sleep.
Saying yes to baking for fun with friends, for working out because contrary to what I've told myself forever it IS productive even if nothing is being cleaned during it.
Here's to focusing on what Jesus is teaching me is important and leaving the other stuff for another day.
Here's to living intentionally.
